People stay for any number of reasons, but here are some we’ve heard in the past: Economic dependence (no money or property ownership)
Physical or Familial Reasons
- Fear of greater physical danger to themselves and their children if they attempt to leave
- Fear of losing custody of children
- Lack of job skills
- Fear of Isolation
- Fear of the court process
- Cultural and religious constraints
- Fear of retaliation
Emotional Reasons
- Fear of loneliness
- Guilt about failure of marriage
- Fear that mate is not able to serve alone
- Belief that mate will change
- Fear of making life changing decisions
Ideology & Thoughts
- “A violent mate is better than no mate at all”
- “Failure to maintain the marriage equal failure as a person”
- People can even justify the behavior by blaming stress, alcohol/drugs, problems at work, unemployment, etc.
- “The abuser rarely beat me, just once in a while. During nonviolent phases mate may fulfill my dream of romantic love.”
